Pinoy Husband and Wife Jokes

Being married is a big responsibility. And with these responsibilities, we create stress and quarrels between husband and wife. We cannot escape the scenario where the husband and wife gets into a fight. They may sound funny sometimes because they tend to say things that they did for the sake of love. It is often that husband and wife also quarrel about the salary or who is going to pay the next bill. Check out these Pinoy Husband and Wife Jokes that will definitely make you relate if you have your husband or wife.

Mister: Nag beerhaus ako! Ang P200 binayad ko sa beer Misis: Bakit kulang ang sweldo mo ng isang libo?
Mister: Ang P800, binigay ko sa dancer kasi alang damit, awang awa ako!

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Si Mister umuwi ng lasing:
Misis: Naglasing ka nanaman!!! palagi na lang kapag lasing ka, naasar ako sa mukha mo!!!
Mister: Kung hindi naman ako umuwi ng lasing, ako naman ang maasar sa mukha mo!!!

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Home version of Who Wants to be a Millionaire:
Husband: dear puede ka ba ngayon?
Wife: di puede pagod ako!
Husband: is that final?
Wife: FINAL!!!!
Husband: ok, can i phone a friend?!?

Husband: ano ang pagkain natin?
Wife: nasa mesa, bahala ka na pumili!
Husband: isang pirasong tuyo?ano pagpipilian ko?
Wife: pumili ka kung kakain ka o hindi!

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Wife: bat gabi ka na?
Husband: sensya na, nag aya mga officemates ko, nagkainuman lang...
Wife: Lasing ka no?!
Husband: Hindi!
Wife: anong hindi? Wala ka naman trabaho, pano ka nagkaron ng officemates?

Mag Asawang Bagong Kasal

Misis:Labs, may maganda akong balita sayo..malapit na tayo maging tatlo sa bahay na 'to..
Mister:Talaga, Labs?Wow. Ako na yata ang pinakamasayang tao sa mundo!
Misis: Buti naman at ganiyan ang nararamdaman mo.Dito na titira ang nanay ko!

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Daddy: Mommy, ang ganda ganda ng anak natin galing ata yan sa iyo ang angkin niyang kariktan!
Mommy: Huh!, paano nangyari iyun eh hindi naman ako ganun kaganda? (kilig kilig)
Daddy: yun na nga eh, wala ng natira sa iyo, nasa anak na natin lahat!

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Mister: Honey nakukunsyensya ako,dapat ko ng ipagtapat ito sa iyo.
Misis: Honey okay sa akin,mahal naman kita.
Mister: Honey alam mo,kapag nagseseks tayo,iba ang pinapantasya kong babae.
Misis: A ganon ba!???Eh honey ikaw naman ang nasa isip ko kapag kaseks ko ang ibang lalaki!!

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Meron Mag asawa nag- aaway:
Mister: mas ok pa yata kung nagpakasal ako sa demonyo!!!
Misis: wehhhh! bawal kaya magpakasal sa kamag- anak.. hehehe

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Isang gabing malamig.. kalabit c Mister kay Misis.
Misis.: not tonight dear, I have an appointment with my OB bukas, dyahi pag may sperm in me.
Mister. : Kalabit uli.... eh sa dentist may appointment ka?

If you have your own collection of Tagalog Jokes, feel free to share it in the comment box. You can also react and share these funny jokes at your social media acount. Stay updated to Pinoy Funny Jokes here at www.boybanat.com and Like our Facebook page  (www.fb.com/akosiboybanat).

Pinoy School Jokes

Going to school can be very boring and you might get uninterested just by thinking about it. Learning is not that always fun enough to get you motivated. But try checking out these Pinoy School Jokes that will definitely lighten up the mood in the context of going to school. These will give you the cracks and the humour that you need to shy away those dull moments. You can relate some of the situations here on what is going around your school. You can share these to your classmates or peers so that you can laugh together with these jokes. 

Titser: Ano ang Pambansang Hayop ng Pilipinas? Nagsisimula ito sa letrang "K"!
Juan: Kabayo?
Titser: Mali! Nagtatapos ito sa letrang "W"!
Juan: Kabayow?
Titser: Mali! May 2 sungay ito!
Juan: demonyong kabayow? Hahahah

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Teacher: Write a sentence ending with HAND.
Juan: My penis in ur hand!
Teacher slapped juan…
Juan: Sorry I forgot to put space between pen and is…^_^

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Teacher: Juan, ba’t lagi mong nilalawayan ang ulo mo tuwing may klase tayo?
Juan: Narinig ko po kasi, sabi ni ate sa boyfriend niya, basain ng laway ang ulo ‘pag ayaw pumasok.

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Mayabang si Pedro
Teacher: Ito na ang resulta ng exam nyo. Si Boy Banat lang nakakuha ng 97%.
Pedro: Ano ha?! Kaya nyo yon?! Wala pang aral yon! Sinasayang nyo lang tuition nyo! Umuwi na kayo mga bubu!!
Teacher: The rest, nakakuha ng 100% !!  hahahahaha

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sa isang Math class..

Teacher: Pedro, kung ako'y may 5 anak sa unang asawa, 10 naman sa pangalawa, at 3 sa pangatlo; meron akong?
Pedro: Kalandian! Isa kang karengkeng Ma'am.

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Teacher asks her pupils what they want to be in the future...
Kiko: I want to be a lawyer
Juan: I want to be a doctor
Nene: I want to be a mother
Pedro: I want to help Nene

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Guro: Pedro, Totoo bang hindi naninigarilyo, di umiinom. di nagsusugal at di  nangchichicks ang papa mo?
Pedrol: Opo!
Pedro: Wow! Anong sikreto nya?
Pedro: walang pera

Teacher: who can make a sentence then translate it in tagalog?
Pupil: my titser is beautiful, isn't she?
Teacher:: very good, translate it in tagalog.
Pupil: ang guro ko ay maganda, maganda nga ba?

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HRM at NURSING Student nag-uusap:
HRM:Penge nga alcohol!!
NURSE:La akong alcohol eh.. sori
HRM:Naturingan kang nursing student, la kang alcohol!
NURSE:Cge nga.pengeng kaldero at sandok!Now n!May dala kb?!

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"The prefix "BI" is used to describe things that come in two's like BIcycle, BIfocal,
and BInary.
Can you give me an example Juan?"
JUAN: (lunok) "Ma'am.. B*YAG?"

These are jokes that can give us humour, fun and enjoyment but we still have to remember that they are still jokes. Some may get hurt or be 'corny' about it, but regardless about these queries, just enjoy browsing and sharing these Pinoy School Jokes to others by visiting frequently www.boybanat.com and other social media partners:

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