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ERAP Jokes Collection


Erap Jokes Collection is a feature about the comic character and funny jokes conversation of Erap with the other people and personalities. Erap Jokes are very popular on TV, tabloid and even today in social media networks, blogs and website. Did you know that Joseph "Erap" Estrada, is a former Mayor of San Juan City, a Senator and the former President of the Philippines. He's the first one to be elected as President and Vice-President. Now, He is currently the Mayor of the City of Manila. Here's the funny and the best Erap Jokes Collection that you'll surely laugh on it. Hope your enjoy it!

CARABAO
Teacher: Can you give me an example of a beast of burden?
Erap: Carabao, ma’am!
Teacher: Very good, ERAP. Can you give another example?
Erap: How about another Carabao?

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KLASMEYT
Classmate 1: What is 5 plus 4?
Erap: Eh di 9!
Classmate 2: What is 4 plus 5?
Erap: Gagaguhin mo pa ako eh binaligtad mo lang... eh di 6!



MILF
ERAP to MNLF : Sumuko na kayo!
MNLF: Di kami susuko pag di mo maispel ang CEASEFIRE.
ERAP : s#3t! Tuloy ang giyera.


SAFE SEX
Nag-usap sina FVR at Erap sa sexual practice nila.
FVR: Naniniwala ka ba sa safe sex?
ERAP: OO naman, sinisigurado ko na wala ang mga asawa
nila kapag ginagawa ko yon.

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WRISTBAND
Erap taking a bath nang biglang lumindol. He ran outside the Beverly Hotel without his clothes on.
Guard: Mr. President! I think you forgot something…
Erap: What the F*#! Yung wristband ko!

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SOFDRINK
Tanong: Ilan litres meron ang Coke 2000?
Erap: Apat!
Tanong: Ha?
Erap: LITRE C, LITRE O, LITRE K, LITRE E!! 'anga!

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SIGNAL LIGHT
Driver to Erap: Sir, pweding pakitingin kung umiilaw yung parking light
(as driver switches on the parking light)
Erap: OK, its ON! Gumagana.
Driver: Sir, yung headlights, umiilaw ba? (as driver switches on the headlights)
Erap: OK rin, its ON! Gumagana.
Driver: Sir yung signal light pakitingin?
(as driver switches on the signal light)
Erap: Gumagana, ay ayaw, ay gumagana, ay ayaw, ay gumagana, ay ayaw…

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LUNCH
After finishing the main course at lunch meeting with Clinton.
Erap is asked if he would like another serving.
Erap replies politely: “No thank you. I’m fed up already.”

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CHIPPY
Ramos: Erap, why do you cry while eating Chippy? And why do you shed your tears on the wrapper?
Erap: Because it says here on top "Tear here"

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WALEY
Sa isang French resto kasama si Jinggoy:
Sabi ni Erap: “Anak, magpa-va-let na lang tayo.”
Jinggoy: “dad val-ey parking po.”
Nang nasa loob na ng resto:
Erap: “ayan mag-buff-et tayo anak.”
Jinggoy: “dad, it’s buff-ey.”
Matapos kumain at magbabayad na:
Erap: “naku anak, nakalimutan ko sa car ang
aking wall-ey!”

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ALLIGATORS
In a cabinet meeting ERAP (galit na galit) :
"THERE HAS BEEN A LOT OF ALLEGATIONS THESE DAYS AND I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHO THE "ALLIGATORS' ARE"!

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8 FEET
Friend: Pareng Erap may regalo ako sa b-day mo phyton ang haba grabe 8 feet.
Erap: ako ba niloloko mo hindi ako tanga no, alam kong walang paa ang ahas 8 feet ka pa dyan. Tanga!

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SEAFOOD
Erap & Gloria having a conversation:
Gloria: Salamat at nagkabati na tayo sa wakas
Erap: Oo nga, dahil dyan i-treat kita sa paborito kong restaurant
Gloria: Saan?, ano b paborito mong mga pagkain?
Erap: Hulaan mo nagsisimula s letter "C"
Gloria: Calamares?
Erap: No.
Gloria: Cakes? Calamansi?
Erap: Mali lahat.
Gloria: Sirit na nga!
Erap: Edi C-Foods (Seafoods)

*     *     *     *      *

AIRPLANE
Steward: Sir are you done?
Erap: No, I'm Erap
Steward: I mean are you finished sir?
Erap: No, I'm a Filipino
Steward: i mean are you through?
Erap: What do you think of me FALSE?



Erap Jokes Collection is NOT to intend to take anything serious to any individual  but these are exaggerations and not close to reality. These are collected from other websites, blogs and social media sites. So if you have your own favorite Erap Jokes out there, you can simply post it here.

2 comments:

  1. TED FAILON: Mr. President kung may hihilingin kayo sa diyos ano po ito?

    ERAP: nuon hiniling ko na maging artista ako binigay nya hiniling ko maging mayor ako binigay nya hiniling ko maging presidente ako binigay din nya... kahit nga yung hndi ko hiniling binigay din nya

    TED FAILON: ano po yung hndi nyo hiniling na binigay nya?

    ERAP: ang mabilanggo

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nc erap nakakatawa

    ReplyDelete

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