Tagalog Magkumpare Jokes and Pinoy Pare Jokes

Here's a extensive collection of best, naughtiest, funniest and latest Tagalog Magkumpare Jokes and Pinoy Pare Jokes, made just for you and to share with. This Pare Jokes collection also features funny conversation of famous magkumpare Pedro and Juan. If you have your own favorite Tagalog Pare Jokes, we would love to hear it, simply add a comment below or just email it to us with a subject: pare jokes, and will posted up for you. Hope you'll like it!

Pedro: Pre! Ano ang mas mahalaga, pera o asawa?
Juan: Syempre, pera! Kasi, ang pera, habang tumatagal, lumalaki ang interes.   Ang asawa, habang tumatagal, nawawalan ka ng interes, tapos, inuubos pa ang pera mo!XD

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Juan: Birthday ng asawa ko...
Pedro: Ano regalo mo?
Juan: Tinanong ko kung ano gusto niya.
Pedro: Ano naman sinabi?
Juan: Kahit ano daw, basta may DIAMOND.
Pedro: Ano binigay mo?
Juan: Baraha.XD

Check out this Tagalog Funny Jokes video of Porkchop Duo

Pedro: Alam mo, yung pusa namin, kahit nakalagay sa lamesa at walang takip ang ulam namin, hindi kinakain!
Juan: Maniwala ako?!
Pedro: Totoo!
Juan: Ano ba ang ulam nyo?
Pedro: Asin!XD

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Juan: pare parang malalim ang iniisip mo!
Pedro: nanaginip ako kagabi kasama ko 50 contestants ng Ms. Universe
Juan: swerte mo! ano problema mo?
Pedro: pare ako nanalo!XD

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Pedro: pare amoy tinapay ka ah..
Juan: talaga? hehe anong klaseng tinapay naman?
Pedro: Putok pare!  XD  

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Juan: Ano ang pinakamainit na bahagi ng katawan ng babae?
Pedro: Singit.
Juan: Bakit?
Pedro: Kita mo, sa sobrang init, nagkaroon ng biyak!

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Pedro: Pareng Juan, what is your greatest fantasy?
Juan: To be kissed by someone in the rain, Pare how about you?
Pedro: to be that someone kissing you in the rain. Love you Pare!

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Juan: Pare! Ang ganda ng dream ko kagabi! Dinidilaan ko ang pagitan ng boobs ni Angel Locsin!
Pedro: Hayop ka, pare! Kaya pala basa ang puwet ko paggising ko! XD

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Juan: mga pare! yung asawa ko, favorite movie niya yung "Lord of the Rings the TWO towers" at sakto, kambal ang anak namin..!
Berto: wala ka sa asawa ko! favorite nya yung "the THREE musketeers" at
sakto, triplets ang anak namin..!!

nagtatawanan ang dalawa nang mapansin nila si Pedro..

Juan: Pedro! bakit parang balisa ka? Di ba manganganak na din ang misis mo?
Pedro: eh meron kasing favorite movie yung misis ko, kinakabahan ako...
Berto: anong movie ba yun?
Pedro: 300..!!XD

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Pedro: "pare, malungkot ka ata?"
Juan: "marami akong problema 'pre.."
Pedro: "wala yun 'pre. tumingin ka sa akin..."
Juan: "pare naman, please lang. wag mo nang dagdagan pa!"XD

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Juan: Uwi na ako at gustong gusto ko na hubarin ang panty ng misis ko!!!
Pedro: Bakit, hot na hot ka na pare?
Juan: Hindi!!!! Masiyadong masikip sa akin eh!XD

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Pinoy Pambasted na Banat and Mga Banat na Pang Basted

Is there someone courting you but you don't have feelings on him? and you're thinking on how to say it? well, here's a collection of the best, funniest and latest Pinoy Pambasted na Banat and Mga Banat na Pangbasted made just for you and to share with and even post it in your facebook or twitter status.  If you have your own favorite Tagalog Pambasted na Banat, we would love to hear it, simply add a comment below or just email it to us with a subject: pinoy basted, and will posted up for you. Hope you'll like it!

Pambasted para sa mga makukilit manligaw:
"How many times do i have to flush before you go away?"

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I'm funny. you're funny looking.
so, we have something in common.
but i still don't like you. so go awaaaay!!!

Check out this Pinoy Jokes video  that feautures Basted is Tandang

A Girl brought over his new boyfriend for the girl barkada to meet..after several hours, the guy excused himself.

Girl: so guys, how is he? feedback!
Barkada: he's ok. pero friend, KM sya.
We all agreed.
KM translation: KUTIS MAHIRAP

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Boy: Hi. kilala kita db classmates tayo nung high school?
Girl: SO, GALING KA RIN PALA SA ALL GIRLS SCHOOL!!!!

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Oh bakit buhay ka pa? kala ko ba pag di ko sinagot calls mo papakamatay ka na? bkit di ka pa rin patay?

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When a Boy approached the Girl with a smile....
Boy: Hi miss...can i...
Girl: sorry....nagbigay na ako ng donation sa mga kasamahan mo...

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Pambasted banat sa kaibigang naliligaw:
"You're such a good friend why ruin our friendship"

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Pambasted na banat ng mga babae sa manliligaw...
"Hindi tayo bagay kasi ako dyosa ikaw halimaw."

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Boy Banat: pwede ba kitang maging kaibigan?
Girl Banat: i don't want you to be my friend
Boy Banat: bakit naman
Girl Banat: sorry...you don't meet my standards eh

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Pinoy Comedy Banat and Komeding Banat Jokes

Here's a extensive collection of best, funniest and latest Pinoy Comedy Jokes and Komeding Banat Jokes, made just for you and to share with.  If you have your own favorite Komeding Banat Jokes, we would love to hear it, simply add a comment below or just email it to us with a subject: comedy banat, and will posted up for you. Hope you'll like it!

Kapag tumulo ang sipon sa harap ng crush mo..
ito sabihin niyo...
kita mo na? pati sipon ko nahuhulog na sayo...
gusto mo inumin ko toh para sayo?...Nyahahaha

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Tanda: Pwede ho bang manawagan?
Host: Ilang taon na po kayo?
Tanda: 98 na po ako.
Host: Wow! Ang tanda nyo na pala! O sige po, manawagan na kayo.
Tanda: Dad, umuwi na kayo! Hindi na nagagalit si Lolo sa inyo

Check out this Tagalog Funny Jokes video on youtube

Boy: miss taga saan ka:
Girl: bakit:
boy: gusto ko lang malaman kung saan ka nakatira,ibig kitang haranahin mamayang gabi...
Girl: naku hindi na uso yun....
Boy: ano na uso ngayun:
Girl: halika hatid mo ako sa sogo..

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GIRL: Hubarin mo na bra ko...
BOY: O, ayan...
GIRL: Hubarin mo na panty ko...
BOY: O, ayan, hinubad na...
GIRL: Sige, next time, 'wag mo na isusuot mga gamit ko ha!

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Umuwi ng bahay si Boy Banat…
Boy Banat: Nanay! Pinapatawag ka sa Principal’s Office!
Nanay: Bakit?! May ginawa ka na namang katarantaduhan?!
Boy Banat: Ako ba?! Baka ikaw?! Ikaw ang ipinapatawag, di ba?! isip isip naman dyan.gee!

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Boy: pag mag asawa na tayo di kana maglalaba.
Girl: weh? talaga? bakit naman?
Boy: kasi araw araw na tayong nakahubad.

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Si Pedro bumili ako ng cond0m sa mini stop.
Cashier(girl): Sir, ipaplastik ko pa po ba?
Pedro: Hindi na, susuotin ko na e.

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Ayoko nang madidi-dikit sa pintuan...
sawang-sawa na akong tawaging boy next door.

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Boy: alam mo, para kang albatros deodorizer.
Girl: bakit naman?
Boy: kasi binigyan mu ng halimuyak ang mala-inodoro kong buhay..

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Pedro: Nakabili na ko ng hearing aid. Grabe! ang linaw na ng pandinig ko!
Juan: Talaga?! Magkano bili mo?
Pedro: Kahapon lang

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Banat ng nanay sa anak
Aanuhin mo pa ang alak kung sa akin pa lang tatamaan ka na!!!

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Girl: Hatid mo ko.
Boy: Ayoko. Wala ako pera ngayon.
Girl: Ayaw mo?! Bahala ka! Wala pa naman tao sa bahay ngayon.
Boy: Aba! Tingnan mo nga naman. May naipit pa pala akong bente sa wallet.

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There are 70 ways to make me happy first is to LOVE ME!
then the rest is 69

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Tagalog Funny Break-Up Lines and Pinoy Funny Breakup Banat

Looking for funny tagalog effective way of breaking up? Nice to drop by as we give you the best and effective Tagalog Funny Break-Up Lines and Pinoy Funny Breakup Banat for you to share with. If you have your own favorite Tagalog Funny Break-Up Lines, we would love to hear it, simply add a comment below or just email it to us with a subject: breakup banat, and will posted up for you. For entertainment purpose only and hope you'll like it!

Break na tayo! kasi...
Hindi ka mayaman,
Hindi ka gwapo at hindi ka matalino...
(brutal! Nyahaha!)

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Girl: sawang sawa na ako sayo..you're always like that.
pagod na ako..itigil na natin ito
Boy: hindi ka na makakapaghanap ng tulad ko tandaan mo yan.
Girl: shut up! you think maghahanap pa ako ng tulad mo!

You can also check out this Pinoy Break Up video

Boy: I want to focus on my studies
after 2 days my girlfriend na pala ang Bugok,
classmate pa niya, focus nga!

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(Boy to his GF)
Boy: "Ayoko ko na sa 'yo"
Girl: "What?"
Boy: "Type ko ang kuya mo."

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Girl: "May ipagtatapat ako sa 'yo...
(nagboses lalaki) Bro, di na tayo talo."

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You better dump me before I lop your d1ck off
and feed it to my pet piranha!

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Boy breaking up to a girl...
Boy:  "I'm Gay.."

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Break na tayo! kasi...
"May AIDS ako...XD

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Break na tayo! kasi...
aahm.. it's not you.. it's your face..XD

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Tapusin na natin to.di tayo sexually compatible
di mo masabayan ang libog ko...nyahaha!XD

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Tagalog Inuman Jokes and Pinoy Lasing Jokes

Here's a extensive collection of the best, funny, naughty and latest Tagalog Inuman Jokes and Pinoy Lasing Jokes made just for you and to share with. If you have your own favorite Tagalog Inuman Jokes and Pinoy Lasing Jokes, we would love to hear it, simply add a comment below or just email it to us with a subject: lasing jokes, and will posted up for you. Hope you'll like it!

Nung tinanong ako ng magulang ko,
“Anong napapala mo sa kaka-inom?”
Tinanong ko rin sila,
“Anong napapala ninyo sa kaka-sermon?” XD

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Nahuli ni misis si mister na lasing sa club,
kaya nagpanggap siyang GRO. Mrs:”Pogi, gusto mo ko i-table?”
Mr: “Ayoko sa yo, kamukha mo asawa ko!”

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“Biruin na ang lasing, kahit pa ang bagong gising,
wag lang ang bading na inagawan ng booking.”

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While drinking with the boss, she challenged,
“Ang ayaw na uminom, bading!” Wanting to go home already,
I told her, “Babu na girl, Suko na akesh!”

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You know why alcohol is better than milk?
Pangit kasi pakinggan yung, “Tara ‘tol, dede tayo!”XD

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A girl in a bar was offered margaritas, got drunk & was gang-raped.
The next day, not remembering what happened the previous night,
she came back to the same club & was again offered the same drinks.
She said, “Ayoko na ng margarita, masakit sa puk*!”

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During a drink fest in Tagaytay, my cousin was so drunk that she chased my gay friend shouting, “Halika dito, gagawin kitang lalake!” XD

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Text exchange between 2 friends:
Ben, the hunk, and Alvin, the gay who was drunk.
Ben: Matagal ko nang tinatago ang nararamdaman ko para sa'yo.
Mahal na mahal kita.
Alvin: “Oh my gosh, akala mo ba ikaw lang?
Mahal na mahal din kita, Ben!” (long pause)
Ben: “Pare, wrong send ako.”

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Two drunks peeing in public toilet, one straight, one gay. Gay was watching straight guy as he peed. Straight: “Pag di ka tumigil, hahampasin kita nito!” Gay: “Promise?” 

Isang girl may nakitang umiihing lasing sa daan.
Girl: “Ano ba yan! Ang daming bulb*l pero ang liit ng t*ti!”
Lasing: “Anong gusto mo, maraming tit* pero maliit ang bulb*l?”

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Lasing 1: “Pare totoo bang babaeng lamok lang ang nangangagat?”
Lasing 2: “Tanga, pati aso nangangagat!”

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Lasing 1: Ano nga pala spelling ng orange?
Lasing 2: Alin, yung kulay o yung prutas?

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Namatay yung kapitbahay namin na drug dealer.
Sa 1st night ng bur0l, may mga dumating na addict na mga lasing.
Biglang lumapit yung isa, sabay yumakap sa kabaong
sabay sigaw ng, “Drug lord, bakit mo kami iniwannn!!!”

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During an all-girl inuman, one friend complained that only ugly men are courting her. Another friend assured her, “Ganun talaga, kasi yung mga guwapo, sila-sila ang nagliligawan!” 

If you have you own hilarious Tagalog Inuman Jokes and Pinoy Lasing Jokes, feel free to share it with us and we will be very glad to have it posted here. For latest quotes, jokes and banat lines, just visit us again at www.boybanat.com or at our Boy Banat Official Facebook (www.fb.com/akosiboybanat).

Pinoy Long Distance Relationship Love Quotes and Sayings

Simple quotes to live by and simple tips to try to have a long distance relationship that works. Here's a collection of the best, romantic and latest Pinoy Long Distance Relationship Love Quotes and Sayings made just for you and to share with and even post it in your facebook or twitter status.  If you have your own favorite Pinoy / Tagalog Long Distance Relationship Love Quotes and Sayings, we would love to hear it, simply add a comment below or just email it to us with a subject: long distance, and will posted up for you. Hope you'll like it!

Hindi naman talaga distansya ang nakakasira sa LONG DiSTANCE RELATiONSHiP..
Kundi ang kawalan ng TiWALA at mga MALiNG HiNALA.

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Dahil sa ikaw ay nasa malayo, may mga gabi na ‘di ako makatulog. Kaya ang
madalas kung ginagawa ay tumingala sa mga bituin sabay bulong sa hangin,
“Kahit magkalayo tayo at wala ka sa piling ko ikaw parin ang laman ng puso’t
isipan ko”.

Check out this video about Long Distance Relationship

Para sa akin kong mahal mo ang isang tao
Walang excuses sa isang buwan na hindi ninyo pag uusap
Ano ka basahan na pag kailangan ng patongan ng kaldero

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Ang tunay na lalaki, kahit malayo ang mahal niya, hindi niya magagawang
mangbabae. Kahit sabihin pa na maraming umaaligid sa kanya, para sa kanya,
wala ng hihigit pa sa mahal niya.

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Sa long distance relationship, may chance na ma develop ka sa iba, pero
tandaan: “di ka ma dedevelop sa iba, kung pipigilan mo dahil: Mahal mo ang ka
relasyon mo, at may konsensya ka.

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Mahirap maging masaya,
lalo na’t malayo ka
Minsan gusto ko ng sumuko at ayaw nang umasa
Ngunit pag-ibig ko sa iyo’y totoo
Kaya naman hinding hindi ko magagawang bumitaw.

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Huwag kang maiinis o magalit kahit sumusobra na ang pagseselos at paghihinala
sayo ng taong mahal mo..Magtaka ka kung yang selos at hinala niya bigla na
lang mawala at lahat ng ginagawa mo balewala na rin sa kanya.

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Paglayuin man tayo ng panahon,
wala ka man sa tabi ko ngayon.
Alalahanin mong lagi kang nasa puso ko
at ikaw ang laging laman ng isip ko.

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